“I.T.”: stereotyped B-movie show how the values in the information technology world have changed since I worked in it

I.T.”, by John Moore, is indeed a formulaic B-movie about computer hacking, but it manages to make a few important points about how the world of “information technology” and the people who work in it, has changed since I made a living at it from 1970-2001.

The film boasts Irish James Bond actor Pierce Brosnan as executive producer, and Brosnan plays tech magnate Mike Regan, who behaves more like Donald Trump than a silicon valley executive, because he is aging. Regan has formed an aviation company that will provide an air-taxi service like Uber and wants to take it public. He’s hired a personal I.T. consultant Ed Porter (young Australian actor James Frecheville) to handle the GUI in his office. But Ed takes an interest in Mike’s 17 year old daughter (Stefanie Scott) and starts showing up in situations where he’s not invited. Mike gets irritated and fires Ed, who then takes revenge by hacking Mike’s smart home and company, even interfering with his SEC filing.

Until the late 1980s or so, “IT” was dominated by mainframe computing with a lot of batch cycles and character driven online terminals. Things started to migrate toward minis and PC’s partly because of the military at first, and most of us remember the changes as the Internet was unleashed in the 1990s. The I.T. world made some resurgence before Y2K and then tended to fragment into a “W2” contractor-driven market was demand and supply for older expertise dwindled. This actually hurt when this kind of maturity was needed to build a technically reliable health care system that we call Obamacare. Had a better job been done in putting it together, it might not have become a flashpoint in the 2016 elections. In fact, in the distant past, the polite term for “I.T.” used to be “management information systems”, along with the stodgy “systems development life cycle”.

When you meet Frecheviile’s character, you want to see him play a good person instead of a villain. Why not cast him as an entrepreneur inventing a new security company doing away with ransomware once and for all. Physically, at about 26, he is quite “cute”. But it appears, by comparison on Google images, that he must have waxed his chest for this film (like Steve Carell, the “man-o-lantern” in “The 40 year Old Virgin” (2006)). .

I do remember seeing Brosnan in “Die Another Day” in 2002, some time after 9/11, a film that depicted North Korea as supply terrorists. (Then there is “Red Dawn II”, and North Korea’s nuclear threat today.) Brosnan was real hairy then.

This new film was shot largely in Ireland. There are sets made up to present the Kennedy Center with a backdrop of the Capitol and Washington Monument, that obviously look fake.

Name:  “I.T.”
Director, writer:  John Moore
Released:  2016
Format:  2.35:1
When and how viewed:  Netflix Instant
Length:  98
Rating:  R
Companies:  Voltage
Link:  official  don’t confuse with a 2017 horror film “It” which I haven’t seen yet, or with the Stephen King novel and TV movie.

(Posted: Friday, May 26, 2017 at 6:30 PM EDT)

“The Circle”: satire as a super Facebook wants to rule the world and turn it into one group mind

The Circle” is actually a sphere that looks like a marble, and is a micro camera, something like Google glasses.  In this satire, directed by James Ponsoldt and based on the novel by Dave Eggers, the plan is to get everyone the planet to wear one and be continuously logged on to this new super reinvention of Facebook.  The color is red, rather than blue, so it is less inviting to color-blind people, for starters.

Emma Watson plays Mae, a bill collector (it seems like everybody works in collections these days as movies begin) who gets invited to join this new Silicon Valley company. She already has a good life kayaking and with a humble blue-collar boyfriend Mercer (Ellar Coltrane, whose recreation of his Mason persona from Boyhood is a little forced).  But her dad has multiple sclerosis and Mae (unlike me) has gone to the effort to get her parents to have some competence with tech.

Pretty soon she buys into the sinister aims of the company guru  Bailey (Tom Hanks) and COO (Patton Oswalt) to rule the world. Beyond super Amway attitudes, they goad all their employees into sharing everything all the time.  They want use The Circle to register voters and run elections, and to make every email everyone has ever sent transparent to the whole world.  I kept wondering how long before the 2016 election was this written, as the references to Hillary Clinton’s email scandal are pretty transparent.

They have a slogan, secrets are lies, and want to destroy all privacy completely.  In fact, they see all of humanity as one group mind, so you wonder if the film is a metaphor for distributed consciousness, dolphin style.

But you can also take the film as asking, whether all human activity ought to become eventually public and knowable by others, who may want to “connect the dots” the way I do.

Mercer wants to stay out of this, but is dragged in with tragic results.  Maybe he needs resurrection.

There is an odd scene early in the film were Mae is given a medical physical, and told to drink a prep (rather like for a catscan) containing nanobots, which communicate to her Fitbit watch (they also put electrodes on her upper chest. I wondered if employees were Holter monitors all the time.)

Jack Andraka wants to do a lot with nanobots, as these two stories show (Huffington and Telegraph).

There was sci-fi movie with the title Circle reviewed here June 6.

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Name:  “The Circle”
Director, writer:  James Ponsoldt, Dave Eggers
Released:  2017
Format:  2.35:1
When and how viewed:  2017/4/29 Angelika Mosaic fair crowd
Length:  110
Rating:  PG-13
Companies:  STX Entertainment, Europa (some financing from
Link:  official

(Posted: Saturday, April 29 at 11:30 PM EDT)

“Why Him?”: Because he can make make “Michigan” great again, even when his own computers aren’t safe; Trump will love this movie

Why Him?”, the title of a comedy by John Hamburg (with a story by Jonah Hill and Ian Helfer), is what the potential “father of the bride” Ned Flemming (Bryan Cranston) asks of his daughter Stephanie (Zoey Deutch) when she invited the Grand Rapids, Michigan family to her billionaire boyfriend’s ashram in the Silicon Valley.

The answer is, Laird Mayhew (James Franco) is going to Make America Great Again.  It’s not too much of  a spoiler to say that Laird saves Ned’s printing business to changing it to manufacturing something in Michigan that will create manufacturing jobs:  Japanese toilets, that don’t need toilet paper but clean up after you anyway.

There are all kinds of other animals and gadgets on the estate, including a voice and seeing eye Justine that watches them everywhere. Inside his yurt, Laird does his thinking but, like Trump, doesn’t allow computers in this one little sanctum.

Franco, now 38, has his bod covered with tattoos, possible partly because “he’th’mooth”.  At 38, his eyes look furrowed and gaunt, and, well, his legs are embarrassing.  Is he likely hooked up to Peter Thiel’s plan to live forever?

But Laird has that same core of honesty or integrity that Ned has; so Stephanie has found a potential husband that actually extends the character of her own father.  But, then again, Alan Turing had that same kind of integrity.

Griffin Gluck is sensational as the teen Scotty who will take over dad’s new manufacturing company before finishing high school, with Laird’s support.

Name: “Why Him?”
Director, writer:  John Hamburg, Jonah Hill, Ian Helfer
Released:  2016/12/23
Format:  1.85:1 (yet from Fox, without Cinemascope)
When and how viewed:  Alamo Drafthouse, Ashburn, VA (yes, they will kick you out for using a cell phone) 2017/1/4
Length:  111
Rating:  R
Companies:  20th Century Fox
Link:  official

Grand Rapids montage on Wikipedia; the river picture on top appears in the movie in winter in the opening scene.  In my sequel screenplay, “Prescience”, set on another planet, there is a special community called “Grand Rapids”.

The Alamo Drafthouse offered a comedy preshow including a short “Bounce 3”: two gay men with a comedy motorcycle routine in the Arizona desert (one of the actors looked like Seth Rogen);  and “Drop Door” about a bizarre party honoring a military veteran with B.O.

(Posted: Wednesday, January 4, 2017 at 7:30 PM EST)

“Snowden” by Oliver Stone and Gordon-Levitt not quite the real thing

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Name: Snowden
Director, writer:  Oliver Stone
Released:  2016/9/16
Format: 2.35:1
When and how viewed:  2017/9/17, Cinepolis, NYC, 23rd St (Tribeca site)
Length 135
Rating R
Companies: Open Road
Link: Site

I don’t think that Oliver Stone’s new ongoing biography of Edward Snowden (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) is quite as powerful as Laura Poitras’s own “reality” documentary “Citizenfour” (see Index), because the real Snowden is so charismatic.  I’m reminded of Jesse Eisenberg’s playing Mark Zuckerberg in “The Social Network”.

The film, where Snowden tells his story in flashbacks, is a visually engaging account of his ardor, which started when he trained to be a Ranger and broke both legs because his bones couldn’t handle the stress.  That sounds like some sort of genetic condition, and I wasn’t aware that he had epilepsy, and had to avoid the meds to stay sharp on the job.

The film does display his brilliance on various contracts, such as the hippy Gabriel (Ben Schnetzer), his young Hawaii boss Trevor (Scott Eastwood), and various teachers and recruiters (Tom Wilkinson, Nicholas Cage), journalist Glenn Greewood (a youthful Zachary Quinto, still spock-like) and earnest filmmaker Laura Poitras (Melissa Leo) and girlfriend Lindsay Mills (Shailene Woodley). I thought I saw Oliver Stone in a cameo.

Much of the film centers on the Mira Hotel days in Hong Kong, before Snowden escapes (through a cooperative Asian family) to Moscow and seeks ironic political asylum. The film explains how “Xkeyscore” could spy on ordinary data that Americans don’t post in public mode in social media. It also documents the Guardian’s publication of the “NSA Papers” and shows how Snowden got the San disk out through security hidden in a Rubik’s cube.

I saw the film in the Cinepolis in Chelsea.  The theater allowed the film to complete over an hour after the explosion in the neighborhood, which we discovered when leaving the theater.

Mashable has a telling list about Snowden’s “10 most important” revelations (including PRISM). But there are troubling questions about the military secrets, affecting the safety of troops and even American civilians overseas, that Snowden might have surrendered, as Michael B. Kelley writes in Business Insider.

The film was produced and distributed as quasi-independent by Open Road.

(Published Sunday September 18, 2016 at 11 AM EDT)

“Equity”: Wall Street soap opera indeed

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Name: “Equity”
Director, writer:  Meera Menon, Amy Fox, et. a;
Released:  2016/8
Format:  1.85:1
When and how viewed: Angelika Mosaic, Fairfax VA, 2016/8/21, late afternoon, light attendance
Length 100
Rating R
Companies: Sony Pictures Classics, Broad Street (no relation to Broad Green?)
Link: official 

Equity” (directed by Meera Menon, based on a story by Amy Fox, Sarah Megan Thomas and Alysia Reiner) is a nice little soap opera set in Wall Street, where women can have it all, and get into pretty much the same ethical and legal conflicts as the guy.

The boss lady is a macho Namoi Bishop, played by a burly Anna Gunn, as the somewhat defrocked head of a hedge fund.  She sees the chance to redeem herself by bringing a particular company, Cachet, to IPO.  The company claims to be a “privacy company that has set up a social network”.  There is some interesting jabber about NSA surveillance, Ed Snowden, secure socket layers, and defeating the “man in the middle attack”.

Other players are Naomi’s right hand (Sarah Megan Thomas), a probing and ambitious assistant district attorney Samanta (Alysia Reiner, whose mannerisms reminds me of the character “Kate” in the NBC soap “Days of our Lives”, mixed with an extinct character, Sami), a middle-aged boyfriend Michael (James Purefoy), and the whizbang programmer who built Cachet, a red-haired and hairy chested kid Ed (Samuel Roukin), who shows he knows how to be mean when a programmer has to be.

Needless to say, sexual politics and affairs ensue, and a bedroom is the best place to get by the best smartphone security.

The film happens largely indoors (a lot of it shot in Philadelphia), with some effective outdoor shots of Manhattan and Brooklyn, San Francisco, and, I think, Shanghai.

At the end, Samantha gets the last line, which says there is nothing wrong with women liking to make money for its own sake.

There is something complacent about all this, people who believe that this special sheltered financial world will be there forever.

The oblique reference to doing business in China is interesting.  In 2013, I got persistent emails about whether I intended to try to “brand” my “do ask do tell” site and books in China, and it’s very curiosu that I would get an inquiry like this.  And it wasn’t spam; it was legitimate when I checked it out.  How would they get past China’s firewalls and censors?

The pre-show included a 4-minute short “Waveform” by Stefan Nadelman, abstract and animated, about surfing (like “The Endless Summer” in 1966).

(Posted: Sunday, August 21, 2016 at 9:15 PM EDT)

“Lo and Behold, Reveries of the Connected World”, a meditation on the Internet by Werner Herzog with some definite warnings to the less human

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Name: Lo and Behold, Reveries of the Connected World
Director, writer:  Werner Herzog
Released:  2016
Format:  1.78:1
When and how viewed:  Landmark E Street, 2016/8/19
Length 98
Rating NA
Companies: Magnolia Pictures
Link: official

 

The last of the ten sections (“The Future”, which was itself the name of a 2011 film about a goofy couple seen through the eyes of a stray cat) of Werner Herzog’s new meditation, “Lo and Behold, Reveries of the Connected World” is the most prescient for me.  After examining artificial intelligence, it shows a man undergoing a brain MRI and predicts that soon we will be able to read each other’s thoughts and fantasies (maybe even sexual fetishes) through smart phones.  The film didn’t mention the new invention, DuoSkin, supported by Microsoft, which could destroy some fantasy life.

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That section also maintains modern Internet communication seems to be broadcast for all to hear, and doesn’t care a lot about the needs of a specific recipient. That sounds like a characterization of my own web development supporting my “Do Ask, Do Tell” books over the years.   The film speculates that future human beings may curiously not be as socially connected as in the past, the “Alone Together” (Sherry Turkle) syndrome.

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Earlier sections also get attention.  There is a section on “Internet Free Zones”, such as around the radio telescope at Green Bank, W Va, where there is no cell service for several miles in all directions because that would interfere with faint radio astronomic observations of distant worlds (maybe like finding extrasolar planets).  Several women with unusual wireless wave sensitivities talk about the pleasures of living there as real people, completely off the grid.  (I visited Green Bank in May 2013 and got several pictures but I don’t recall much discussion about the absence of cellular service.) The film then also mentions an Internet addiction clinic in Washington state  (see “Web Junkie”, July 2, about such a boot camp in China).

It also gets alarming predicting “The End of the Internet” by a solar storm, specifically recounting the history of the Carrington Event in 1859 (see book review Aug. 12).  The film didn’t mention our near miss with another one in July 2012 by the position of the Earth in orbit around the Sun.  Furthermore, other threats, like high altitude EMP blast, are possible.  The film does cover the fact that we have become dependent on technology and probably could not survive if a terrorist or enemy (or nature) pulled the plug suddenly.

There is a brief interview with Elon Musk about the progress in his plans to eventually colonize Mars — and provide the Internet to the scattered communities (a 15 minute delay from Earth for Facebook and Twitter for the speed of light).

The film opens by visiting a sacred altar room at UCLA, where the first Aparnet computer worked on Oct. 29, 1969.

There is also an early section about trolls and personal meanness on the web, particularly concerning the gratuitous circulation photos of a car crash victim.  Early designers of the Web didn’t anticipate users attacking one another. The architects had more faith in human nature than can be justified in a world where people are so “unequal” and disconnected that they see little point in following the rules or in civility.

(Published: Friday, Aug. 19, 2016 at 10:45 PM EDT)

“Zero Days”: the history of the Stuxnet worm, and how the blowback just could destroy America

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Name: “Zero Days”
Director, writer:  Alex Gibney
Released:  2016
Format:  digital video
When and how viewed:  Landmark E St, 2016/7/8, fair audience 7 PM, had played at AFI Docs
Length 114
Rating PG-13
Companies: Participant Media, Magnolia
Link: Site

Zero Days” (or “World War 3.0”) is Alex Gibney’s latest political documentary, and this one comes with a serious warning.

If the U.S. and allies (especially Israel and the UK or “Little England” now) can hack into hostile countries industrial control systems (even for the laudable process of stopping the development of nuclear weapons) they can do it to us.

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The documentary, with lots of interviews, particularly with a translucent female avatar (Joanne Tucker) playing a combined NSA analyst, establishes the case that the U.S. drove the development of the Stuxnet worm during the Bush administration, in order to compromise nuclear-related centrifuges in Iran.  The worm was so well written that it could completely cover its tracks, and it made many “zero day” exploits that could fire off according to parameters (but the same idea is common in ordinary maware  and even mainframe crime, where elevation integrity has been compromised).

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The code was developed at the NSA, and at corresponding facilities in England and especially Israel. The Pentagon put in a “cyber command” in place at the NSA headquarters at Fort Meade (south of Baltimore) with the authority to deploy the cyber weapon.  The CIA was also involved, especially in bridging the “air gap” and getting the malware delivered (possibly on a thumb drive) by an operative when the system (normally offline of the Internet) was being maintained.

In time, some security companies, especially Symantec and then Kaspersky in Moscow, began to see evidence of the worm, which first showed up in Belarus (a former Soviet republic).

Obama continued the process, but the U.S. “got caught”, and Iran retaliated at least twice, once against Saudi Arabian oil companies and once against several US banks in early 2013. But in the meantime, the US has embarked on an even bigger program against Iran’s infrastructure called “Zeus”.

The film warns that a state-sponsored hack could compromise many US industrial systems.  It showed the May 2015 Amtrak crash in Philadelphia, as a false example (because positive train control wasn’t in place there).  It suggested that if the power grids were overloaded or the Internet went down, the world might be like “humpty dumpty”.

An ordinary hacker serving malware, even ransomware, through phishing or drive-by websites could not accomplish this kind of a hack because of the “air gap” to the internet, but an internal operative could probably install the malware.  (Router hacks might become more destructive in the future, especially given the “smart home.”) The main states capable of such hacks would be Iran, North Korea (as we know from the Sony hack) and Russia, and probably China.   Some of this material was covered in Ted Koppel’s book “Light’s Out” (2015).

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The film had been shown at AFIDocs.  It’s possible that it’s release helped prompt the warning from Sinclair Media  (near Baltimore) about cyber attacks and possibly EMP on the power grid.

Wikipedia attribution link for Natanz nuclear facility in Iran, by Hamed Saber, under CCSA 2.0.

(Published, Friday, July 8, 2016 at 11:15 PM EDT)

“Web Junkie”: In China, teen boys are sent to boot camp for Internet and game addiction

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Name: Web Junkie” (from “Storyville“)
Director, writer:  Hilla Medalia, Shosh Shlam
Released:  2015
Format:  digital video
When and how viewed:  Netflix instant play
Length 75 min
Rating N/a (PG-13?)   In Chinese, subtitles
Companies: Shlam, Chicken and Egg, Kino Lorber, Tribeca, PBS
Link: PBS site; imdb

Web Junkie” (2015), in a brisk 75 minutes, documents the life of teenage boys sent to a boot camp near Beijing for Internet addiction, particularly playing games in Internet cafes.

The film seems to have been conceived as an episode in a  1999 television series called “Storyville”. The film seems to have been shot in 2013.

The school offers military style living with pushups, and 10-day solitary confinement for disciplinary infractions, as when one kid leads an “escape” to a café.  The school calls the Internet “electronic heroin” and addiction an “abyss”.

The school also pressures parents to come an live nearby on campus and participate in the “therapy”.

The film documents how authoritarian Chinese society treats introversion as a personal luxury of decadence, creating a situation where the privileged kid mooches off the social relations forged by others   A society like this sees social solidarity as a virtue unto itself, regardless of whether the bigger ideas of the group are right.  Therapy goes along with conformity to the group’s (“Communist”) values.

There’s a scene where a mother pleads with her son, saying she had “suffered” with his addiction. The film brings up the subject that many of the boys are only children (as a vestige of China’s one child policy), so their excessive self-absorbance can threaten the family line.

The kids say that “reality is too fake”

At the end, in an epilogue, a father hires a “hit man” programmer to kill the avatar in his unemployed son’s video game world.

The film is rather claustrophobic, and rarely goes outside into the “real world”.  A closed “mental hospital” or military camp does not provide “real life”.

South Korea is also reported to have camps for Internet addiction.

Wikipedia attribution link for NASA space shot of Beijing (p.d.)

(Published: Saturday, July 2, 2016 at 12 noon EDT)

“Killswitch” examines overzealous government copyright enforcement and surveillance on Internet

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Name: Killswitch
Director, writer: Ali Akbarzadeh
Released:  2014
Format:  regular aspect, video film
When and how viewed: 2016/5/25, from distributor site (small $$), Vimeo
Companies: Akorn, CineCities
Link: official site and viewing window

Killswitch”, in 73 minutes, shows us how Internet freedom is attack from established legacy corporate interests and from gratuitous government surveillance and prosecutorial overreach, often as an indirect result of corporate lobbying.  The film summarizes, with some detail in biography, the accomplishments and perils of Aaron Swartz (ending in tragedy) and Edward Snowden, and focuses on three main interview subjects: Lawrence Lessig, Tim Wu, and Peter Ludlow.  It also chronicles the defeat of PIPA and SOPA (Stop On-line Piracy Act of 2011) by Swartz’s activism, which included shutting down Wikipedia and some other free sites for one day in January 2012 to make a point.

The film characterizes “the hacktivist” as a nerd who repurposes the Internet infrastructure for activism. It cites Twitter as the most adopted platform for politics, citing the Arab spring, but neglecting to mention the abuse by ISIS “recruiting”.

The aggressive action by government against some infringers, mostly concerning copyright and “piracy”, has been abetted by the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act of 1986.   The Act, as per the film, views violation of a providers TOS (“terms of service”) as a possibly prosecutable crime. (The Act may have been motivated by a sensational Hollywood sci-fi film “War Games” in 1982.)  I can recall a cyberbullying prosecution back around 2007 justified by violation of Myspace’s TOS, in pre-Facebook days.  The government has, most of all in the copyright-related cases, tended to prosecute people to make examples of them (most of all Swartz, by US Attorney Carmen Ortiz, who also would be involved in prosecuting Dzhohkar Tsarnaev (the film shows a clip of the Boston Marathon bombing to make an indirect point).  The film notes the career of former Senator Chris Dodd, who went to work for the MPAA.  I’ve always wondered if what Hollywood worries about is not so much direct piracy (really, do  people who can’t afford $15 premium 3-D tickets but watch pirated DVD’s affect their bottom line that much), but “amateur” competition, from films like this one, which can capture not so much consumer dollars as consumer time at home.  (Even Mark Cuban admitted that to me an email about his “Blogmaverick” one time.) The film hints that government harassment is a way to send a message to introverted people (mostly young men) who are “too smart” to deal with other people more conventionally.

The NSA surveillance issue is a bit of a different beast.  Here the film takes the position that the government is collecting so much information that it really can’t see the real threats, missing 9/11 and the Boston Marathon incident.

The name of the film suggests another concept not covered: the idea of an “Internet kill switch”, which a president could try to pull in a national security emergency.  I think there are real concerns that Donald Trump in particular might use such a facility, particularly to shut down user generated “amateur” content that doesn’t pay for itself.

The film does not seem to be available on Amazon or Netflix, but can be watched on Vimeo from the Website for $5 by credit card or Paypal.  The technical production values are quite impressive.

Related films include “The Internet’s Own Boy” (2014, Brian Knappenberger), “Deep Web” (2015, Alex Winter), “Citizenfour” (2014, Laura Poitras)  and “The Thread” (2015, Greg Barker), and Glenn Greenwald’s book “No Place to Hide” (2014).

(Reviewed: Wednesday, May 25, 2016 at 67 PM EDT)

“All Work, All Play”: how geeky gamers can play in the big leagues

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Name: “All Work, All Play”
Director, writer:  Patrick Creadon
Released:  2015
Format: M, 1.85:1  M, 1.85:1
When and how viewed:  Netflix instant, also available on Amazon
Companies: O’Malley Creadon, Filmbuff
Official site: Facebook

All Work, All Play” certainly educated me on the idea that computer gamers have their own pro circuits. The best gamers can make over $1 million a year.

And they live together in team houses, mostly around places like San Jose, before and during the tournaments.  Players, largely young white men (some clean cut, some with tattoos) interact like programmers in the crash houses in the early days of Facebook in Palo Alto.  Entire ice arenas are rented and set up with holograms to show the audiences the progress of the games (rather like “The Hunger Games” in appearance, maybe?)

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In fact, a good deal of the footage if this 93-minute film shows the insides of the fantasy world of these lacrosse-like battles, often in medieval-looking settings.

The whole idea of big gamer tournaments makes me think of chess championships (all over the world, but especially in big East Coast cities), and also of poker “world series” events in Las Vegas (which sounds like a good place to hold a gamer event).

One thing that’s interesting is that now, it seems that games – and an interesting in designing game characters with personalities – have been around for a long time, since the 80s.  Remember the film “Pixels” (Chris Columbus)?

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So, you don’t have to be Bryce Harper or Jake Arietta to be a star in a “sports” world. Geeks can do it too.  Remember that the hero of NBC’s “The Event”, Sean (played by Jason Ritter) is a gamer whose geek skills help him become a clean cut super-hero of the series – and Sean doesn’t even know that he is an extraterrestrial alien, destined to live a millennium himself. OK, maybe Mark Zuckerberg really is an alien himself.